Have you asked why people are defensive? Where is this coming from? I think it would do us some good if we *all* took the advice you include you in your piece, like actively listening -- and starting with having a conversation, instead of actively looking for things to get offended about (that includes all parties).

Every single time I delve further into your point above - I'm met with the same answers: people are fearful of losing their sense of self/identity and their livelihood (one need only look at the Rust Belt as an example on how this happened). To dismiss these fears only creates more divisions.

There's also a certain privilege in being up to date on these terms, like BIPOC, reverse racism, and the history of "sis" -- you are obviously educated in this area, but many people aren't. They don't need scolding - but how about a conversation first?

I'm also not clear as to who this piece is directed to -- if it was actually to white men, how do you honestly think they would respond? You patronize all throughout and then you insert the overused "how to be better" blurb on how they should educate themselves -- do you sincerely think this will help facilitate understanding and they will rush to order those books you listed? My guess is not.